Kyun Kyun, Kyun Kyun, watashi no kare wa hikikomori! ソクラテスはキモかった。Socrates wa kimokatta. (Socrates was repulsive). -Friedrich Nietzsche Ranka Lee of Macross F sings ‘Watashi no kare wa pilot‘ (originally by Lynn Minmay, composed by legendary Hane-Ken). But I want her to sing ‘Watashi no kare wa hikikomori.’ A pilot is a war hero, and evokes certain images: Red baron. Red comet. Amuro, Char, Saotome Alto. But, war hero is as old as McCain’s gray hair. In the age of 2-D, in anime or dating sims, we make girlfriends. So the characters should sing, “私の彼はひきこもり (my boyfriend is a hikikomori).” Hikky is new hero. Why am I a hikky? First, I have eisoptrophobia. In other words, I’m spectrophobic. I’m afraid of mirror. Man in the mirror is a kimo-ota, hetare. If you are リア充 ria-juu, (living satisfactory life), you see a narcissist in the mirror, but if you’re experiencing a “perception of failure” as Glenn Beck calls it, you find yourself repulsive. kimoi (repulsive) + otaku = kimo-ota. That is Man in 3-D. Yes, mirror is exactly a reflection of yourself in the 3-D world. That’s why I can’t face the mirror. I think mirror is a measurement of autophobia (self-loathing), just like John Lennon said “God is a concept to measure our pain.” So, God is in a sense our mirror. Confession room has a mirror. That’s why the Japanese put a mirror in a shrine, symbolizing the divine power. The Sun Goddess Amaterasu said, “treat this mirror like you treat me.” The Shinto mirror is just like the all-seeing eye on a dollar bill, or the eye of evil from Lord of the Ring: it has a penetrating power to see through illusions to the truth. Scopophobia I can’t see myself in the mirror, and at the same time, I don’t want the public to see me. I’m afraid of being looked. So, I have scopophobia like Morino from Okami san and her seven friends. You know, eye contacts are highly stressful. It causes a great deal of anxiety. Why? Because eyes are like the mirror. It reflects you. Yes, eyes are the camera lens. I know why stars feel uncomfortable when they’re taken pictures by paparazzi. It’s the same. I feel uncomfortable being taken pictures with their natural lens. Everywhere you go, there are cameras. Wal-Mart, parking lot, cross section of the traffic. London is the worst, citizens are constantly being watched. So, I can’t get out at the marketplace, because of agoraphobia, a fear of the market, just like these German shepherds returning from wars. That’s why I need privacy from Orwellian 3-D. zoophobia I also have zoophobia. I don’t like beasts including dogs and cats. I thought humans were different from animals, but turned out to be otherwise. The truth is human beings are part of the animal kingdom, so zoophobia includes anthropophobia, a fear of humans. Because of zoophobia, I try to avoid eating meat. Not because of health reason. I don’t want to mix with lower creatures. It’s carnal and bestial. And the meat of beasts makes men violent. Probably macho men are the closest to the beasts since they are the most violent one. Because I’m a misanthrope, I’m horrified to be in a huge crowd. It wears me down. Women are slightly better than dudes. At least they don’t come off violent and intimidating. More than 90% of violent crimes are committed by dudes. Dudes get really aggressive, you can imagine some sports bar, they always start a fight during football game. Alcohol makes them extremely violent, so I try to avoid alcohol also. "Boys bullied me a lot in kindergarten." "Because of that, I still get nervous to talk to boys even today." Dudes are scary, so I’m also androphobic, i.e., misandrist. Macho men are cruel and brutal, especially Taikukai-kei (jocks), the alpha male type. I’ve long experienced male aggression since preschool like S[...]